Jesus Says Porn Is Bad, NSA Spyware Is Good..?

I see we have a new Speaker Of the House in Clowngress, replacing… uh, Mr. Whosit… you know, the thing. Should we bother to learn the name of this latest model? Ohhh, he claims to be a devout Christian. Somebody should fact-check that.

*GunnerQ looks around the Church.*

Sigh. GenX means that either I do it, or nobody does.

*GunnerQ snaps on his fisking gloves.*

Mike Johnson and His Son Monitoring Each Other’s Porn Intake Is Worse Than You Think

h ttps://www.yahoo.com/news/mike-johnson-son-monitoring-other-154928238.html

By Ellie Quinlan Houghtaling for New Republic, 6 November 2023

House Speaker Mike Johnson’s unusual porn habits could have ramifications for the entire country.

Just so long as it’s on this side of the Blue Dress.

In a newly resurfaced video from 2022…

Wow. Johnson (heh) is so lacking in personality that, after becoming the #3 top government official in the United States, his enemies had to go back an entire year to find dirt on the guy. For a Christian in Clown World, that’s a red flag. He should have had a well-established history of intolerance, patriarchy, firearm ownership, pronoun presumption and long nights spent in the company of Auntie Semit.

Come on, man. Even stunt doubles for stroke victims aren’t afraid to have a personality. Looking at YOU, you’re-not-Fetterman!

(In fairness, Johnson has done legal work for Christian interests and opposes homosexuality. None of which has ever endangered his acceptance within the halls of GAE power.)

In a newly resurfaced video from 2022, the newly minted speaker admitted that he and his son monitor each other’s porn intake using a third-party subscription software called Covenant Eyes that watches all their electronic devices. For $16.99 a month, the app drafts a habit report and shares it with an “accountability partner,” which in Johnson’s case is his teenage son Jack.

Truly do the Scriptures say, “Every great cause begins as a movement, becomes a business, and eventually degenerates into a racket.” ― Eric Hoffer.

Wait.

His barely-legal, peak-hormones son is monitoring Daddy’s porn usage? Doesn’t Johnnie have a Church friend that might be a little more… age-appropriate?

Also, the only reason a married man would have a porn problem, is if his wife is an ice queen.

“What it does, real simply, is it has an algorithm and a software—it’s way above my head how it works, but—it scans, you obviously opt into it, but it scans all the activity on your phone or your devices, your laptop, what have you. We do all of it. Then it sends a report to your accountability partner,” Johnson said.

“My accountability partner right now is Jack, my son. He’s 17. So he and I get a report about all the things that are on our phones, all of our devices, once a week. If anything objectionable comes up, your accountability partner gets an immediate notice,” Johnson explained.

“I’m proud to tell ya, my son has got a clean slate,” he added.

Is that because…

A. Johnnie’s balls are kept in a purse.

B. Johnnie is chemically castrated, perhaps by antidepressants.

C. Johnnie himself is happy, but he’s deeply suspicious about his son’s sexuality, wants to monitor that, and has the minimal self-awareness to realize that a one-way peep show would be even creepier than a 17yo keeping tabs on the health of his father’s marital bed.

D. Johnnie visits a gay bathhouse for his “needs”. Forget Epstein’s Island, I want to know about Epstein’s Basement Room In the Capitol Building. Don’t tell me it didn’t exist. Airplanes are expensive, y‘know, and I already know about his Manhattan project.

There are no right answers here. For once, I share the suspicions of the Deep State.

And speak of the devil.

Aside from the weirdness of having your son watch your porn intake—and vice versa—the implications of having one of the most prominent leaders in government under the watchful eye of an intrusive software have not been lost on some, who believe the app could pose a national security risk.

“A US Congressman is allowing a 3rd Party tech company to scan ALL of his electronic devices daily and then uploading reports to his son about what he’s watching or not watching.... I mean, who else is accessing that data?” tweeted the user Receipt Maven, who first resurfaced the video.

That’s not just a third party.

Segue

The Ungodly Surveillance of Anti-Porn ‘Shameware’ Apps

h ttps://www.wired.com/story/covenant-eyes-anti-porn-accountability-monitoring-apps/

By Dhruv Mehrotra, 22 September 2022

Covenant Eyes is part of a multimillion-dollar ecosystem of so-called accountability apps. These apps are marketed to both churches and parents as tools to police online activity, and they charge a monthly fee to do so. Some of these apps monitor everything their users see and do on their devices, even taking screenshots (at least one per minute, in the case of Covenant Eyes) and eavesdropping on web traffic, WIRED found. The apps then report a feed of all of the users’ online activity directly to a chaperone—an “accountability partner,” in the apps’ parlance.

From the Christian perspective, that’s unacceptable. The male sex drive is not evil, full stop. Is porn bad? Yes. Is anybody going to Hell because he had a pinup poster in his bedroom for the occasional bishop-flogging? I doubt it. Blah blah idolatry, ye Churchians, but when you behave as though the male libido needs to NOT EXIST then you’re the problem. Feminism, original sin, marital abandonment, 1 Corinthians 7, look it up.

From the Congressional perspective, that’s a national security problem. The Speaker Of the House voluntarily maintains spyware on all of his Internet usage?

The current iteration of the Covenant Eyes app was developed by Michael Holm, a former NSA mathematician who now serves as a data scientist for the company.

There are no coincidences in Current Year. Certainly not after the Twitter Files revealed how many intelligence assets “retire” to social media management.

The system is allegedly capable of distinguishing between pornographic and non-pornographic images.

It’s not. Which is why the system needs to report to a human “accountability partner” instead of simply blocking you.

But Covenant Eyes and Accountable2You do much more than just police pornography. When WIRED downloaded, decompiled, and tested Covenant Eyes and Accountable2You, we found that both apps are built to collect, monitor, and report all sorts of innocent behavior. The applications exploited Android’s accessibility permissions to monitor almost everything someone does on their phone. While the accessibility functionalities are meant to help developers build out features that assist people with disabilities, these apps take advantage of such permissions to either capture screenshots of everything actively being viewed on the device or detect the name of apps as they’re being used and record every website visited in the device’s browser.

What an intelligence bonanza! The NSA can track the entirely of a Christian’s online behavior, with his permission, at his expense, by preying on the sexual shame pre-installed by the Churchian community in general and his domineering wife in particular.

Sourced from Johnson’s Wikipedia page. I like the Chad statue laughing in the background. He does have four kids, so his wife probably isn’t an ice queen, so that’s Option “A” crossed off… but she’s certainly dominating him in this picture.

What’s common across Covenant Eyes, Accountable2You, and EverAccountable is their zero-tolerance approach to pornography. All three suggest in their marketing materials that not only is watching porn a moral failure, but any amount of porn consumption is bad for your health. Their solution: Promote purity through what they call “radical accountability,” a concept wherein a community comes together to confront a person who is living in sin. At its most basic level, the idea is pretty straightforward: Why would anyone watch porn if they are going to have to talk to their parents or pastor about it?

While these apps claim to have helped many people overcome pornography addictions, experts who study sexual health are skeptical that the apps have a lasting positive effect. “I’ve never seen anyone who’s been on one of these apps feel better about themselves in the long term,” says Nicole Praus, a scientist at the University of California, Los Angeles, who studies the effects of pornography on the brain and the spread of disinformation on sexual health. “These people just end up feeling like there’s something wrong with them when the reality is that there likely isn’t.”

THANK YOU! How is it that graduates of the Kinsey School on sexual health, talk more sense than the people who claim to worship the Creator? Sexuality is the one power women have over men, and when you contemplate how ruthlessly women deploy it, you don’t wonder why God denied them a second power over men.

Men today use porn because it’s the option of last resort. Not because men prefer a fake substitute to the real thing. Modern women have failed so completely at being female, that men prefer inanimate objects for those cold, lonely nights! Godly men cut themselves off from fornication, the drinking/drug scene, even platonic dating… forget about a marriage proposal… until they’re reduced to living in isolation from a hypersexualized culture, and what’s their reward from the Church Village People for avoiding even the opportunity for sexual sin? A panopticon surveillance state intended, per its advertisements, to shame him for not being able to escape his own body.

The Evangelical Church does not allow men to be innocent of sexual sin.

In totally unrelated news, the birth rate is cratering all across the GAE.

Also in totally unrelated news, men aren’t going to church anymore. Maybe men are lazy, like they never were before.

In RELATED news…

End segue

Johnson held a low profile in the U.S. legislature until his unexpected rise to prominence on October 25, when his long-shot bid suddenly materialized under a historically divided Republican caucus that rejected senior leadership for the role, including House Majority Leader Steve Scalise and Representative Jim Jordan.

Johnson was made Speaker Of the House because he’s so emasculated, even his barely-legal son is watching… along with the NSA… to blackmail him for the slightest, ah, deviation.

Talk about a controlled asset. Even his family treats him like a puppet.